Friday, April 19, 2013

Random

There are funny moments during this mess called infertility.
Well...I think they're funny. I hope they at least help someone crack a smile.



1.  Royal Bee Jelly.  It's a supplement I take in hopes of improving my egg quality.  It is a sticky, brown substance that tastes and smells disgusting.  I like to eat a little and then chase my husband around the house, threatening him with a "bee jelly-licious" kiss.  He hates it and says I remind him of the zombies in 'Walking Dead.' It cracks me up.

2.  Every time a new bill arrives, a tune pops into my head.  "Can you pay my Bills...can you pay my telephone bills...can you pay my IVF bills."  That's right! I have reworked the old Destiny's Child classic to fit my situation.  CAN SOMEONE PAY MY IVF BILLS? I'm for real:-)

3. My dog, Roxie, is a small dachshund mix that weighs about 15 pounds.  She is our baby.  I'm talking my baby, my husband's baby and my other dog's baby.  She rules the house and gets away with murder because she's the little one.  Well, if hubby and I are all cuddled up, she likes to squeeze her short-legged self between us.  I constantly tell her, "You are not stopping any baby-making, Boo.  We go to labs to make babies."  LOL!  I don't think she understands or cares, but it's clear she does not want any other babies, human or canine, coming up in here.

4.  When my Mother and Aunt visited me, I explained all of my supplements to them.  Mom was a great sport and took a few pills so I wouldn't feel alone in the experience.  But she made it clear that she did not want anything that would wake up her 50+-year-old ovaries. LOL!  I told her if the pills wake up her ovaries, we better call the company so they can use her in a commercial.  The money she would make, could definitely pay my IVF bills:-)


5.  My good friend with a brash sense of humor, offered to be my surrogate for free.  Then she started adding stuff.  She wanted maternity clothes, as well as a tummy tuck and boob reduction afterwards.  By the time, she finished her list, I told her I didn't want her services anymore.  We had a good laugh off her diva demands.  Because she is so rough around the edges, she always manages to make me laugh at the worst moments of my journey.  I think it's because she doesn't pity me.  She doesn't have the ability to pity anyone. I love her for it.

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